Friday, August 14, 2015

I'm Not A Good Writer

When I write a rough draft of anything, it is a complete mess. Usually, I can barely stand to read my rough drafts because they are so amateur. Going from my brain to the paper, my writing is full of unnecessary and forgotten words, awkwardness, ugly descriptions, and things that simply make no sense.

I have a boss who is dyslexic, and he's always asking me to help him with spelling stuff. Well, because my spelling is bad too, I'm no help at all. It's probably worse than his, and I don't have a learning disability. He so would not believe me if I told him I was a writer. How can someone as horrible as me be a writer?

It's scary, but while writing pages and pages in this awful way, I rarely look back to fix stuff. In the back of my mind, I know what I'm writing is for the garbage, but that's okay. I only need to get the story out of my head. If I'm really into the story, it's okay if  my writing is way less than perfect. It's okay.

So yes, I am a horrible writer. What I am is a good editor. Now that I think about it, it may not even be fair to say specifically that I'm a good editor because I like showing my work to different people to get feedback. It's probably more accurate to say that I'm good at the editing process. I know what to keep, and I'm not afraid of throwing stuff out.

Even before I started sharing what I write publicly, anything I wrote that I considered done was edited about five times. First I revise, making the story says what I want. I make sure the events are in the right order, the story has the right tone, and that the plot is tight. I do that twice.  Afterwards, I hit the grammar, and it's two rounds of that.  Then at the end, I do one more overall edit. I have edited more times, but that's the typical process.

Although I do get frustrated with how rough my rough drafts are, I'm kind of proud of owning up to being a bad writer.  I rarely get writer's block because I'm not paralyzed by attempting to write perfectly. I know getting things perfect the first time around is impossible for me. When I write, I write directly without stopping.

There is no reason to stop if I'm writing my thoughts, and I'm not too concerned with how things are turning out.